1
00:00:03,235 --> 00:00:06,671
[♪]

2
00:01:15,108 --> 00:01:16,308
Kids, I gotta tell ya,

3
00:01:16,309 --> 00:01:17,842
I love the day
after thanksgiving.

4
00:01:17,843 --> 00:01:19,611
We already got that
"giving thanks" crap

5
00:01:19,612 --> 00:01:21,879
Out of the way,
and we get to have leftovers.

6
00:01:21,880 --> 00:01:23,014
Peg, is it ready yet?

7
00:01:23,015 --> 00:01:24,749
Here it comes!

8
00:01:25,184 --> 00:01:26,817
Ah!

9
00:01:26,818 --> 00:01:29,053
You know, daddy,

10
00:01:29,054 --> 00:01:30,788
That was a great idea
last night:

11
00:01:30,789 --> 00:01:33,091
To only eat the cheese so
we'd have the crust for today.

12
00:01:33,092 --> 00:01:34,125
Al:
Yeah!

13
00:01:35,461 --> 00:01:36,994
I'll bet a lot of
other stupid families

14
00:01:36,995 --> 00:01:38,463
Ate their whole
pizza last night.

15
00:01:38,464 --> 00:01:40,932
And today they're
probably just looking

16
00:01:40,933 --> 00:01:43,168
At the old empty
cardboard box.

17
00:01:44,303 --> 00:01:45,904
Uh-huh.

18
00:01:47,105 --> 00:01:48,906
I can't do it.

19
00:01:48,907 --> 00:01:50,308
Dad, I think I speak
for us all.

20
00:01:50,309 --> 00:01:52,944
This really bites
the big one.

21
00:01:52,945 --> 00:01:55,280
Why can't we have turkey
like real people?

22
00:01:55,281 --> 00:01:56,715
Aw, now, bud.

23
00:01:56,716 --> 00:01:59,918
It's not like your father
is a doctor or a lawyer

24
00:01:59,919 --> 00:02:01,686
Or a bathroom attendant

25
00:02:01,687 --> 00:02:03,554
Or a circus geek.

26
00:02:03,555 --> 00:02:05,556
He's just
a shoe salesman,

27
00:02:05,557 --> 00:02:07,592
Doing the best
he can.

28
00:02:07,593 --> 00:02:09,894
Okay, peg, I think
we get the message here.

29
00:02:09,895 --> 00:02:11,162
Obviously,
this is the fault

30
00:02:11,163 --> 00:02:12,863
Of the only one
who works around here.

31
00:02:12,864 --> 00:02:14,532
That would be,
let me see...

32
00:02:14,533 --> 00:02:17,368
Mm, mm, mm...

33
00:02:17,369 --> 00:02:20,138
Well, goldarn it,
it's me.

34
00:02:21,340 --> 00:02:22,741
Well, what the heck,
I'll quit.

35
00:02:22,742 --> 00:02:25,543
Then we'll be
a-eating, won't we?

36
00:02:25,544 --> 00:02:28,412
Oh, honey, nobody
wants you to quit.

37
00:02:28,413 --> 00:02:31,516
We all appreciate
what you do for this family.

38
00:02:32,418 --> 00:02:34,586
[laughing]

39
00:02:39,291 --> 00:02:41,325
Well, we might as well
face the facts.

40
00:02:41,326 --> 00:02:43,028
This food thing
isn't going to go away.

41
00:02:43,029 --> 00:02:44,596
We've gotta get
some money here.

42
00:02:44,597 --> 00:02:46,898
There's got to be something
here we can sell.

43
00:02:46,899 --> 00:02:48,767
How about mom's
engagement ring?

44
00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:50,535
Kelly!

45
00:02:50,536 --> 00:02:52,370
Now, that ring is
a symbol of our love.

46
00:02:52,371 --> 00:02:53,939
We could never,
heh-heh,

47
00:02:53,940 --> 00:02:55,840
Put a price
on that.

48
00:02:58,610 --> 00:02:59,677
That's right,
honey.

49
00:02:59,678 --> 00:03:00,812
Like they say:

50
00:03:00,813 --> 00:03:02,880
Glass is forever.

51
00:03:04,283 --> 00:03:05,383
Hey.

52
00:03:05,384 --> 00:03:06,918
Oh, come on, al.

53
00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:08,186
I had it
appraised

54
00:03:08,187 --> 00:03:09,421
The day after
our wedding.

55
00:03:09,422 --> 00:03:12,724
Remember when
you were resting?

56
00:03:12,725 --> 00:03:14,826
It was a big day
for mommy, honey.

57
00:03:14,827 --> 00:03:17,962
Yeah. That was the last
day of rest for daddy.

58
00:03:17,963 --> 00:03:21,098
Hm. What about kelly's
school books?

59
00:03:24,303 --> 00:03:26,104
We could
sell these.

60
00:03:26,105 --> 00:03:28,106
Oh, yeah,
my english book.

61
00:03:28,107 --> 00:03:31,276
Oh, I ain't got
no use for that.

62
00:03:31,277 --> 00:03:32,911
Honey,
these school books

63
00:03:32,912 --> 00:03:35,814
Are very important
to your future.

64
00:03:35,815 --> 00:03:37,616
Oh, who am I kidding?

65
00:03:37,617 --> 00:03:40,051
Let's see what
condition they're in.

66
00:03:40,052 --> 00:03:41,285
Well,
let's see.

67
00:03:41,286 --> 00:03:42,954
Wait a minute.
What do we got here?

68
00:03:42,955 --> 00:03:44,222
What's this?

69
00:03:44,223 --> 00:03:46,057
Detention,
detention.

70
00:03:46,058 --> 00:03:47,592
Expulsion.

71
00:03:49,895 --> 00:03:51,996
Oh, here's something
interesting.

72
00:03:51,997 --> 00:03:54,032
Host a foreign
exchange student,

73
00:03:54,033 --> 00:03:56,567
Receive $500
a month expenses.

74
00:03:56,568 --> 00:03:58,136
That's what
we'll do, peg.

75
00:03:58,137 --> 00:04:01,806
We'll get us one of those
$500-a-month foreigners.

76
00:04:01,807 --> 00:04:04,775
Gee, I don't know,
honey.

77
00:04:04,776 --> 00:04:06,444
We don't have
much room.

78
00:04:06,445 --> 00:04:07,745
Where are they
going to sleep?

79
00:04:07,746 --> 00:04:09,281
Well, what's
the garage for?

80
00:04:09,282 --> 00:04:11,116
I know,
I know!

81
00:04:11,117 --> 00:04:12,984
It's for the car.

82
00:04:18,324 --> 00:04:20,892
We'll move it over
to the side.

83
00:04:20,893 --> 00:04:22,660
Yeah, but it's freezing
in there, dad.

84
00:04:22,661 --> 00:04:25,830
Hey, I didn't say we should
sleep in the garage.

85
00:04:25,831 --> 00:04:27,632
[laughing]

86
00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:31,602
I wonder when little "y-vette"
will get here.

87
00:04:31,603 --> 00:04:33,471
Uh, kelly.

88
00:04:33,472 --> 00:04:36,307
I believe her name
is pronounced "yvette."

89
00:04:39,778 --> 00:04:42,046
I was pronouncing it
in english.

90
00:04:45,384 --> 00:04:47,785
Oh, man,
what a break.

91
00:04:47,786 --> 00:04:50,755
Getting a 17-year-old
french babe.

92
00:04:51,891 --> 00:04:52,957
Sniff, sniff.

93
00:04:52,958 --> 00:04:54,892
Oh, the times
we'll have.

94
00:04:56,395 --> 00:05:00,431
Don't go boinging around
the house just yet, toad boy.

95
00:05:01,733 --> 00:05:03,167
Frenchie's
all mine.

96
00:05:03,168 --> 00:05:04,635
At last I'll have,
like, a sister.

97
00:05:04,636 --> 00:05:06,337
A real girl.

98
00:05:06,338 --> 00:05:07,838
Not just a boy

99
00:05:07,839 --> 00:05:10,775
Trapped in
a pimple's body.

100
00:05:10,776 --> 00:05:11,642
It'll
be great.

101
00:05:11,643 --> 00:05:13,277
I can teach her
about american guys,

102
00:05:13,278 --> 00:05:15,013
And she can carry
my school supplies.

103
00:05:15,014 --> 00:05:16,080
You know,
like my music,

104
00:05:16,081 --> 00:05:19,450
My walkman,
my overnight bag...

105
00:05:19,451 --> 00:05:20,819
My make-up.

106
00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:23,321
The red light bulb
that goes over your head.

107
00:05:25,691 --> 00:05:28,392
Oh, you mean like
when I get an idea?

108
00:05:31,097 --> 00:05:33,330
Al, do you think
we should've

109
00:05:33,331 --> 00:05:35,165
Picked yvette up
at the bus station?

110
00:05:35,166 --> 00:05:37,101
No. I hate
bus stations.

111
00:05:37,102 --> 00:05:38,870
Vagrants, winos...

112
00:05:38,871 --> 00:05:41,439
There's people there who'd
cut your throat for a nickel.

113
00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:42,907
I think
I see someone.

114
00:05:42,908 --> 00:05:45,310
She's dragging her trunk
down the street.

115
00:05:45,311 --> 00:05:46,410
Al, give her
a hand.

116
00:05:50,249 --> 00:05:52,550
Hey!
Over here!

117
00:05:58,057 --> 00:06:00,058
Boy, it's getting
cold out there.

118
00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:03,161
[knock]

119
00:06:08,234 --> 00:06:10,735
[french accent]
hello, my name
is yvette.

120
00:06:10,736 --> 00:06:13,471
Hello.
Welcome to our country.

121
00:06:13,472 --> 00:06:15,740
We have so many
questions to ask you.

122
00:06:15,741 --> 00:06:17,208
Um, what's your
country like?

123
00:06:17,209 --> 00:06:18,409
Uh, how was
your trip?

124
00:06:18,410 --> 00:06:19,911
Where's
our money?

125
00:06:21,146 --> 00:06:23,514
I apologize
for "ze animals."

126
00:06:25,951 --> 00:06:27,118
I'm bud bundy,

127
00:06:27,119 --> 00:06:30,088
Your love
interest.

128
00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:32,323
And this is
mom and dad.

129
00:06:32,324 --> 00:06:33,157
And I'm kelly.

130
00:06:33,158 --> 00:06:34,625
You'll be going
to school with me,

131
00:06:34,626 --> 00:06:36,627
So if there's a heinie
to be kissed around here,

132
00:06:36,628 --> 00:06:37,728
It's mine.

133
00:06:39,498 --> 00:06:41,933
Oh, my, you are
so attractive.

134
00:06:41,934 --> 00:06:44,736
Are all american girls
as beautiful as you?

135
00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:46,637
In their dreams.

136
00:06:51,310 --> 00:06:53,845
Well, I am so happy
to be in chicago,

137
00:06:53,846 --> 00:06:56,214
Land of the cubs
and the big wind.

138
00:07:03,188 --> 00:07:04,422
Al.

139
00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:05,589
It wasn't me.

140
00:07:05,590 --> 00:07:06,924
Oh.

141
00:07:09,562 --> 00:07:11,896
I would love
to talk for hours,

142
00:07:11,897 --> 00:07:14,098
But I'm cold
and tired.

143
00:07:14,099 --> 00:07:15,866
Uh, where will
I be sleeping?

144
00:07:15,867 --> 00:07:19,003
My room
is this way.

145
00:07:19,004 --> 00:07:22,340
The left side of the bed
is for you.

146
00:07:22,341 --> 00:07:24,808
That's because he wets
to the right.

147
00:07:27,213 --> 00:07:29,613
Oh, now, kids.

148
00:07:29,614 --> 00:07:31,783
No, honey, you'll be staying
in the guest room

149
00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:32,884
Next to
the car.

150
00:07:32,885 --> 00:07:34,518
Yeah.

151
00:07:34,519 --> 00:07:37,088
Now, if it's a little chilly
in there, don't worry about it.

152
00:07:37,089 --> 00:07:40,992
We're going to try to get
that garage-door down real soon.

153
00:07:40,993 --> 00:07:42,192
Got it! $500.

154
00:07:42,193 --> 00:07:43,628
Ha, ha!
Gimme that.

155
00:07:43,629 --> 00:07:46,431
Well, I've had a long flight,
and a long walk from downtown,

156
00:07:46,432 --> 00:07:48,699
So I'm a--
I'm a little hungry.

157
00:07:48,700 --> 00:07:51,068
Do you think I could
have a little bite--

158
00:08:08,086 --> 00:08:10,421
And this is the hall
where my locker is.

159
00:08:10,422 --> 00:08:14,559
Uh, kelly, we've been
at school for hours.

160
00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:17,829
Will we be going
in a classroom today?

161
00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:21,165
Look, do you want to see how
it's done in america, or what?

162
00:08:21,166 --> 00:08:23,768
I'm sorry.
What happens next?

163
00:08:23,769 --> 00:08:25,870
Well, first we'll
meet some boys.

164
00:08:25,871 --> 00:08:27,505
Uh, how do we do that?

165
00:08:31,710 --> 00:08:33,511
Kelly, hi!
Hi, listen.

166
00:08:33,512 --> 00:08:35,746
Saturday nights
my parents are out.

167
00:08:35,747 --> 00:08:37,548
Hey, I was
talking to kelly.

168
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:41,852
Oh, you are
so popular.

169
00:08:41,853 --> 00:08:45,056
Yeah, well, I'm kind of like
the beatles of the 20th century.

170
00:08:45,057 --> 00:08:46,925
Now, do what I did.

171
00:08:46,926 --> 00:08:49,427
Oh, no.
I'm far too shy.

172
00:08:49,428 --> 00:08:51,695
Go ahead.
Maybe you'll get one.

173
00:09:00,038 --> 00:09:02,106
Hi, I'm hank.

174
00:09:02,107 --> 00:09:03,408
Welcome to polk high.

175
00:09:03,409 --> 00:09:04,675
What's your name?

176
00:09:04,676 --> 00:09:06,143
Yvette.
Nice to
meet you.

177
00:09:19,691 --> 00:09:21,192
A toast...

178
00:09:21,193 --> 00:09:23,561
To the french.

179
00:09:23,562 --> 00:09:25,530
It's a foul
little country,

180
00:09:25,531 --> 00:09:27,532
But they sure do know how
to write a check.

181
00:09:27,533 --> 00:09:29,867
[laughing]

182
00:09:29,868 --> 00:09:32,036
Kelly, honey, aren't you
going to eat your dinner?

183
00:09:32,037 --> 00:09:33,170
I'm not hungry.

184
00:09:33,171 --> 00:09:34,372
Let me have that.

185
00:09:34,373 --> 00:09:36,207
Watch out,
over there!

186
00:09:37,476 --> 00:09:39,810
What's wrong, you ask?

187
00:09:39,811 --> 00:09:40,911
Well, I'm socially dead,

188
00:09:40,912 --> 00:09:42,113
Yesterday's girl,

189
00:09:42,114 --> 00:09:43,714
A bud.

190
00:09:45,985 --> 00:09:47,452
Why, you ask?

191
00:09:47,453 --> 00:09:48,886
Okay, well,
I'll tell you.

192
00:09:48,887 --> 00:09:51,522
Because the little french poodle
that you all love

193
00:09:51,523 --> 00:09:52,890
Is taking all my action.

194
00:09:52,891 --> 00:09:56,327
Oh, daddy, what's a washed-up
has-been supposed to do?

195
00:09:56,328 --> 00:09:57,328
[grunts]

196
00:10:02,635 --> 00:10:05,135
Mom, what kind of guys
will I wind up with

197
00:10:05,136 --> 00:10:06,404
When no one else wants me?

198
00:10:06,405 --> 00:10:07,338
[grunts]

199
00:10:11,210 --> 00:10:12,877
Oh, no.

200
00:10:13,612 --> 00:10:15,079
Aw, come on, kel.

201
00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:17,048
So yvette makes you
look like day-old eggs.

202
00:10:17,049 --> 00:10:18,582
So what?

203
00:10:18,583 --> 00:10:19,783
There's still hope
for you.

204
00:10:19,784 --> 00:10:21,452
Why, you could be
a coat rack,

205
00:10:21,453 --> 00:10:22,520
An ashtray,

206
00:10:22,521 --> 00:10:23,855
A speed bump.

207
00:10:23,856 --> 00:10:26,023
Listen to
your brother.

208
00:10:26,024 --> 00:10:27,625
[doorbell rings]

209
00:10:27,626 --> 00:10:28,759
Mm, door.

210
00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:29,960
Get the door.
Door.

211
00:10:31,296 --> 00:10:33,730
Sure, I have
no life.

212
00:10:33,731 --> 00:10:35,166
I'll get it.

213
00:10:35,167 --> 00:10:37,702
Maybe it's someone from
the future geeks of america

214
00:10:37,703 --> 00:10:38,735
Wanting me to join.

215
00:10:42,140 --> 00:10:45,008
Yep.
It's the founders.

216
00:10:45,009 --> 00:10:46,777
Hi, kelly.

217
00:10:46,778 --> 00:10:48,946
Uh, peggy,

218
00:10:48,947 --> 00:10:50,948
May we talk to you
for a second?

219
00:10:52,751 --> 00:10:54,184
Let me
have that.

220
00:10:54,185 --> 00:10:55,820
Gimme that!

221
00:11:08,901 --> 00:11:10,200
Mmm?

222
00:11:12,204 --> 00:11:15,906
Uh, peggy, we don't know
how to tell you this--

223
00:11:15,907 --> 00:11:17,475
Well, I do,
steve.

224
00:11:17,476 --> 00:11:21,679
Peggy, al has a young girl
living in your garage.

225
00:11:24,483 --> 00:11:25,883
We saw her
last night

226
00:11:25,884 --> 00:11:30,020
Burning leaves for warmth
in your driveway.

227
00:11:30,021 --> 00:11:31,655
The pig didn't even
have the decency

228
00:11:31,656 --> 00:11:33,323
To set her up
in an apartment.

229
00:11:33,324 --> 00:11:36,460
Well, it's not
that easy, marcie.

230
00:11:36,461 --> 00:11:38,128
You got to buy
money orders

231
00:11:38,129 --> 00:11:39,797
Under a different name
to pay the rent,

232
00:11:39,798 --> 00:11:41,131
Then...

233
00:11:47,205 --> 00:11:49,940
Where do you keep
the extra key?

234
00:11:49,941 --> 00:11:52,276
Just try to get a phone
with an alias these days.

235
00:11:57,816 --> 00:12:00,317
Not that I've ever
given it much thought.

236
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,221
Well, anyway,

237
00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:05,289
Here are some pictures
of her we took

238
00:12:05,290 --> 00:12:08,726
And the name
of a good divorce attorney.

239
00:12:08,727 --> 00:12:11,528
I'm sorry we had to be
the ones to tell you this.

240
00:12:11,529 --> 00:12:12,796
[chuckling]

241
00:12:15,834 --> 00:12:17,769
Look,
I know all about it.

242
00:12:17,770 --> 00:12:21,139
She's just a foreign exchange
student that's living here.

243
00:12:21,140 --> 00:12:22,807
And other than
having to honk

244
00:12:22,808 --> 00:12:24,408
When we want
to get out of the garage,

245
00:12:24,409 --> 00:12:28,045
She's--she's really been
no problem at all.

246
00:12:28,046 --> 00:12:31,315
Yeah. No problem
for anyone but little me.

247
00:12:31,316 --> 00:12:32,717
What's the matter,
kelly?

248
00:12:32,718 --> 00:12:34,218
Oh, it's that yvette

249
00:12:34,219 --> 00:12:35,720
Is dating
all her boyfriends,

250
00:12:35,721 --> 00:12:38,556
And kelly has the social life
of a barn owl.

251
00:12:38,557 --> 00:12:41,058
Kelly's a little
depressed.

252
00:12:41,059 --> 00:12:43,394
Could you handle this?
We're eating.

253
00:12:47,366 --> 00:12:49,299
Oh, now, kelly.

254
00:12:50,301 --> 00:12:52,803
You mustn't
worry over this.

255
00:12:52,804 --> 00:12:55,139
You may find this
hard to believe,

256
00:12:55,140 --> 00:12:59,543
But I myself wasn't
popular in school.

257
00:13:00,712 --> 00:13:02,479
The hell you say.

258
00:13:05,217 --> 00:13:07,117
No, it's true.

259
00:13:07,118 --> 00:13:09,987
I couldn't get a date
with a cool guy,

260
00:13:09,988 --> 00:13:12,757
No matter how much
I put out.

261
00:13:12,758 --> 00:13:14,258
I mean tried.

262
00:13:17,729 --> 00:13:21,265
So I finally
started dating a nerd.

263
00:13:21,266 --> 00:13:22,733
Ha!

264
00:13:22,734 --> 00:13:25,503
[high-pitched laugh]

265
00:13:25,504 --> 00:13:27,305
You dated
a nerd?

266
00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:28,940
Yes.

267
00:13:28,941 --> 00:13:30,608
His name was...

268
00:13:32,043 --> 00:13:34,779
Well, his name
isn't important.

269
00:13:34,780 --> 00:13:37,682
My friends couldn't believe
I'd sunk so low.

270
00:13:37,683 --> 00:13:39,082
Boy, did they laugh

271
00:13:39,083 --> 00:13:41,051
When I let him take me
to the homecoming dance.

272
00:13:41,052 --> 00:13:42,553
Wait a
second.

273
00:13:44,856 --> 00:13:47,692
I took you to
the homecoming dance.

274
00:13:47,693 --> 00:13:49,459
That's right.
You did.

275
00:13:52,431 --> 00:13:54,165
Anyway,
we went on dating,

276
00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:56,700
And I endured the laughter
and the ridicule,

277
00:13:56,701 --> 00:13:58,202
And I came
to marry...

278
00:13:59,671 --> 00:14:03,407
Well, his name
isn't important.

279
00:14:03,408 --> 00:14:04,641
The point is,

280
00:14:04,642 --> 00:14:06,210
Yesterday's nerd
can grow up

281
00:14:06,211 --> 00:14:08,479
To be a wonderful
and giving man.

282
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:09,913
So, if all you can get
is a nerd,

283
00:14:09,914 --> 00:14:11,949
I say try one.

284
00:14:12,917 --> 00:14:14,251
I did.

285
00:14:19,557 --> 00:14:21,125
Hey.

286
00:14:21,126 --> 00:14:23,294
Wait a minute.

287
00:14:23,295 --> 00:14:27,698
I know who you're
talking about.

288
00:14:27,699 --> 00:14:29,033
And let me
tell you something,

289
00:14:29,034 --> 00:14:30,601
You think
you heard laughter?

290
00:14:30,602 --> 00:14:31,902
Well, when I was
dating you,

291
00:14:31,903 --> 00:14:32,903
I had
a few milk bones

292
00:14:32,904 --> 00:14:35,039
Slipped into
my pocket.

293
00:14:37,843 --> 00:14:39,576
I was pretty!

294
00:14:39,577 --> 00:14:41,278
My mother
told me so.

295
00:14:42,881 --> 00:14:46,383
Compared to your mother,
you were.

296
00:14:46,384 --> 00:14:48,385
Oh, so now you
don't like my mother.

297
00:14:48,386 --> 00:14:49,653
What's not
to like?

298
00:14:49,654 --> 00:14:51,889
A 60-year-old woman
who played the drums.

299
00:14:53,191 --> 00:14:54,391
Nerd.

300
00:14:54,392 --> 00:14:55,959
Geek girl.

301
00:14:57,395 --> 00:15:00,130
So that's my future.

302
00:15:00,131 --> 00:15:02,366
Well, that
and 40 pounds.

303
00:15:08,006 --> 00:15:09,372
Never.

304
00:15:09,373 --> 00:15:12,375
I will never sink so low
as to date a nerd.

305
00:15:12,376 --> 00:15:15,012
I may not have much,
but at least I have my pride.

306
00:15:20,852 --> 00:15:24,822
It's been an illuminating
evening, miss bundy.

307
00:15:27,525 --> 00:15:30,560
I'm sorry I spilled
my prune juice on your blouse.

308
00:15:34,966 --> 00:15:37,034
Yeah, and I'm sorry
I punched you in the pelvis.

309
00:15:37,035 --> 00:15:39,369
Oh.

310
00:15:39,370 --> 00:15:41,371
Perhaps I can have
the pleasure of your company

311
00:15:41,372 --> 00:15:43,207
Again next Friday.

312
00:15:43,208 --> 00:15:45,575
The museum is having
a quite interesting exhibit

313
00:15:45,576 --> 00:15:47,544
On the ever-changing
mollusk.

314
00:15:49,214 --> 00:15:53,150
Well, only if you wear
your green pencil pouch.

315
00:15:53,151 --> 00:15:55,152
Turns them all on.

316
00:15:59,857 --> 00:16:01,825
Well, I've had
a great time, guys,

317
00:16:01,826 --> 00:16:02,959
But I
got to run.

318
00:16:02,960 --> 00:16:04,894
Mwah, mwah!

319
00:16:07,265 --> 00:16:08,733
Kelly,

320
00:16:08,734 --> 00:16:11,669
You know what would
make this the perfect evening?

321
00:16:11,670 --> 00:16:13,938
Oh, what, myron?

322
00:16:13,939 --> 00:16:15,872
If yvette would
kiss me good night.

323
00:16:30,922 --> 00:16:33,224
You just blew
a good thing, baby.

324
00:16:42,467 --> 00:16:44,535
Oh, my,
I'm so tired.

325
00:16:44,536 --> 00:16:47,671
Thank goodness you taught me
how to sleep at school.

326
00:16:47,672 --> 00:16:52,076
Uh, so how was your date
with le grand geek?

327
00:16:52,077 --> 00:16:54,845
Well, we sat around
with his parents

328
00:16:54,846 --> 00:16:56,947
And they showed me slides
of their vacation

329
00:16:56,948 --> 00:16:58,615
To the ticonderoga
pencil factory.

330
00:17:03,321 --> 00:17:05,056
You know,
the number 2 pencil is

331
00:17:05,057 --> 00:17:06,457
The backbone
of the industry.

332
00:17:06,458 --> 00:17:08,359
That's
very fascinating.

333
00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:09,526
No, it isn't.

334
00:17:09,527 --> 00:17:11,662
It's the prattle
of the dead.

335
00:17:13,197 --> 00:17:15,232
Listen, yvette,
we really need to discuss--

336
00:17:15,233 --> 00:17:18,469
Oh, I would love to talk
to my little american sister,

337
00:17:18,470 --> 00:17:20,404
But my next date
will be here any moment.

338
00:17:20,405 --> 00:17:23,306
Uh, he told me I could
wear your leather mini.

339
00:17:23,307 --> 00:17:24,708
You don't mind,
do you?

340
00:17:24,709 --> 00:17:26,777
I mean, you are
in for the evening, no?

341
00:17:28,180 --> 00:17:29,146
Thanks.

342
00:17:31,850 --> 00:17:34,819
♪ dum dum dum
dum dum dum dum ♪

343
00:17:34,820 --> 00:17:37,254
Mmm.

344
00:17:38,523 --> 00:17:40,991
♪ dum dum dum
dum dum ♪

345
00:17:40,992 --> 00:17:42,059
Hi, grandma.

346
00:17:53,538 --> 00:17:54,538
Oops.

347
00:17:55,907 --> 00:17:56,907
Sorry, kel.

348
00:17:56,908 --> 00:17:58,208
Must've been
the way

349
00:17:58,209 --> 00:17:59,743
The light hit
your crow's feet.

350
00:18:17,863 --> 00:18:19,830
Bud,
what are you doing?

351
00:18:19,831 --> 00:18:21,998
I'm building
a home entertainment center.

352
00:18:26,504 --> 00:18:28,405
Bud, I need
your help.

353
00:18:28,406 --> 00:18:30,307
I'm desperate.

354
00:18:30,308 --> 00:18:31,875
No, you're not.

355
00:18:31,876 --> 00:18:34,043
Desperate
still implies hope.

356
00:18:36,481 --> 00:18:39,049
You wouldn't want to help me
get rid of yvette, would you?

357
00:18:39,050 --> 00:18:40,150
Pffffft!

358
00:18:41,553 --> 00:18:43,086
Well, I can't
take this anymore.

359
00:18:43,087 --> 00:18:45,155
I'm going to have to
do it myself.

360
00:18:48,059 --> 00:18:49,126
Kelly,

361
00:18:49,127 --> 00:18:52,029
I say this
with all sincerity.

362
00:18:52,030 --> 00:18:56,100
If you truly, truly
want to get rid of her,

363
00:18:56,101 --> 00:18:57,667
I'll kill you.

364
00:18:58,669 --> 00:19:00,104
I really will.

365
00:19:00,105 --> 00:19:02,439
This is
not a joke.

366
00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:04,408
Dead.

367
00:19:11,749 --> 00:19:14,418
Uh, bud,
what are you doing?

368
00:19:16,287 --> 00:19:17,420
Uh...

369
00:19:17,421 --> 00:19:19,056
I'm, uh...

370
00:19:19,057 --> 00:19:21,358
I'm-I'm giving you
s-some ventilation

371
00:19:21,359 --> 00:19:23,493
You know, so the heat
can get through.

372
00:19:23,494 --> 00:19:27,597
Oh, it's all right, bud.
I don't mind if you peep.

373
00:19:29,767 --> 00:19:31,969
Yeah, I'll give
that up...

374
00:19:34,072 --> 00:19:37,207
The day they pry her
from my cold, dead hand.

375
00:19:40,645 --> 00:19:42,746
What a cute
little fellow.

376
00:19:42,747 --> 00:19:44,515
He's toilet film.

377
00:19:45,850 --> 00:19:47,484
Au revoir.

378
00:19:49,554 --> 00:19:52,989
Well, excuse me,
young lady,

379
00:19:52,990 --> 00:19:55,192
But where are you
think you're going?

380
00:19:55,193 --> 00:19:56,226
On a date.

381
00:19:56,227 --> 00:19:57,661
Oh,
no you're not.

382
00:19:57,662 --> 00:19:59,963
I got a call from
the principal today.

383
00:19:59,964 --> 00:20:02,999
And it seems you're failing
all your subjects.

384
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:04,668
We just can't
have that.

385
00:20:04,669 --> 00:20:06,103
I'm failing too.

386
00:20:06,104 --> 00:20:08,805
Uh, kelly, please,
we're talking to yvette.

387
00:20:09,975 --> 00:20:11,375
He didn't mean that,
dear.

388
00:20:11,376 --> 00:20:14,744
You have to study too.
I suppose, ha-ha.

389
00:20:14,745 --> 00:20:17,248
But if she fails,
she has to go back home.

390
00:20:17,249 --> 00:20:21,352
And we're out
500 bucks a month!

391
00:20:21,353 --> 00:20:23,553
We're responsible
for your education.

392
00:20:23,554 --> 00:20:25,522
You know, and if there's
one thing we are,

393
00:20:25,523 --> 00:20:27,024
It's responsible
parents.

394
00:20:27,025 --> 00:20:27,991
[snapping sound]

395
00:20:27,992 --> 00:20:28,992
Oh!

396
00:20:28,993 --> 00:20:30,493
Stop that, al.

397
00:20:30,494 --> 00:20:33,797
I can't help it.
I'm giddy.

398
00:20:33,798 --> 00:20:36,166
Must be from all
this darn eating.

399
00:20:36,167 --> 00:20:37,134
Oh, ho, ho!

400
00:20:37,135 --> 00:20:38,768
Come here.
Come here.

401
00:20:44,909 --> 00:20:47,311
Well, I guess
we better study.

402
00:20:47,312 --> 00:20:48,445
I'd love to,

403
00:20:48,446 --> 00:20:50,480
But I've got to go
dust off my accordion

404
00:20:50,481 --> 00:20:52,716
For school tomorrow.

405
00:20:52,717 --> 00:20:55,619
I've got my eye on
the big, fat tuba player.

406
00:20:55,620 --> 00:20:58,688
Oh please, kelly,
you have to help me.

407
00:20:58,689 --> 00:21:00,890
I'll beg someone
to go out with you.

408
00:21:04,328 --> 00:21:06,997
If I fail, I'll have
to go back to France,

409
00:21:06,998 --> 00:21:10,034
And I'll have to give up
all your boyfriends.

410
00:21:11,669 --> 00:21:13,236
Listen, yvette,

411
00:21:13,237 --> 00:21:15,472
There's no point
in us both staying home.

412
00:21:15,473 --> 00:21:17,073
Go out.
Have a good time.

413
00:21:17,074 --> 00:21:18,342
I'll study,

414
00:21:18,343 --> 00:21:20,711
And when we take our test
you can copy off me.

415
00:21:20,712 --> 00:21:22,346
Oh, you would
do that for me?

416
00:21:22,347 --> 00:21:26,983
Oh, what are little
american sisters for?

417
00:21:31,155 --> 00:21:32,723
[peg sighs]

418
00:21:32,724 --> 00:21:35,859
Okay, who wants seconds
on crust?

419
00:21:38,263 --> 00:21:39,696
I can't
believe it.

420
00:21:39,697 --> 00:21:41,865
Yvette flunked
every subject.

421
00:21:41,866 --> 00:21:43,734
She even
flunked french.

422
00:21:46,103 --> 00:21:49,540
She must be
the stupidest girl
in the world.

423
00:21:49,541 --> 00:21:52,609
Well, I'm the stupidest
girl in america.

424
00:21:52,610 --> 00:21:53,777
I know you are,
pumpkin,

425
00:21:53,778 --> 00:21:56,880
But we're talking about
something important now.

426
00:21:56,881 --> 00:21:59,182
Honey,
you're important too.

427
00:21:59,183 --> 00:22:02,853
Just not as important
as 500 bucks.

428
00:22:02,854 --> 00:22:07,358
Oh, al, now they'll never give
us another exchange student.

429
00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:11,095
Yeah, I never got
to use my holes.

430
00:22:11,096 --> 00:22:12,796
Well, what about me?

431
00:22:12,797 --> 00:22:14,631
I lost a sister.

432
00:22:14,632 --> 00:22:16,065
I'm hurting too.

433
00:22:17,568 --> 00:22:18,568
[car horn honks]

434
00:22:18,569 --> 00:22:20,169
Oops.
My dates are here.

435
00:22:22,140 --> 00:22:23,973
"au verar!"

436
00:22:39,724 --> 00:22:41,925
[♪]